OFFENCES [What To Do With It] ~ Precious Victor Akah
How do you handle offences? Jesus speaking to His disciples in Luke 17:1 says, “It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come!" This means that people will offend you whether you're prepared for it or not, even when you do nothing but the right thing, offence will still come. So, you may not be able to stop people from offending you, but you can stop yourself from being offended, you can stop yourself from taking offence, and you can stop yourself from getting angry, bitter or sad.
And how do you successfully do that? I'll share some knowledge and tips I'm employing with you.
1. A CHEERFUL HEART KEEPS YOU HEALTHY
It is widely held that it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile. About 43 or more to frown, and about 13 or 17 to smile (according to a scientific research). So, there's a high probability that you'll age faster with wrinkles and look older than your age by frowning and being sad often.
And you know what? The Bible already established this truth long ago by saying: A joyful, cheerful heart brings healing to both body and soul. But the one whose heart is crushed struggles with sickness and depression - says Proverbs 17:22 (TPT). Being cheerful keeps you healthy. It is slow death to be gloomy all the time - says Proverbs 17:22 (GNT). Can you see that?
When I understood this, I made up my mind not to let anything and anyone steal my joy and happiness. God has blessed me with good health and I want to remain healthy in body and in soul. Some people's prolonged sickness can be traced to a bitter and unforgiving heart. Sadly also, some persons have lost their lives to depression which originated from a sad, broken and gloomy heart.
Please free your heart of all hurts and pains today. Decide to let go and resolve not to lock up anyone again in your heart. Why sentence yourself to slow death? Why invite sickness and weakness to your body and soul? Decide to let go today and enjoy your life. The person who offended you (knowingly or unknowingly) is probably enjoying their life. Why hurt yourself over and over again when you can let go and enjoy the gift of life God has given you?
2. DIVINE IDEAS COME TO A FREE AND CHEERFUL HEART
If your heart is filled with unforgiveness, bitterness, sadness, anger, hate, grudge or malice, and you're asking God for divine ideas to get wealth, to solve a challenge, to boost your business, to excel in your career, to standout in your workplace, to excel in your academics, or to have a great life and family, the ideas won't be released to you because there is no space in your heart to conceive them.
The ideas will only come when you free your heart of all baggage and make room for divine ideas to come in and be well-processed.
Learn this and choose never to take offence or keep malice.
3. YOU CAN ONLY ENJOY LIFE WITH A CHEERFUL HEART
The moment I realized that life is short, and before you know it, you're 50, 80, 90 and can't do certain things anymore, I decided that I will not let anyone make me miss enjoying and relishing certain precious moments. Do you know that there are events that happen once in a man's lifetime? For example, your wedding day, your graduation day, your child's dedication day, your first child's 1 year birthday celebration, your 1 year wedding anniversary, your 30th birthday celebration, and other significant milestones and precious moments. No one and nothing should stop you from relishing them.
Imagine being gloomy all day on your wedding day because the DJ did not play the songs you requested for? Imagine being sad all day on your graduation ceremony because someone stepped on your new shoes? Or being angry and irritable on your child's first birthday celebration because the cake delivered was not exactly what you ordered for? At the moment you may feel you're doing the right thing and exercising your right to be angry because you're offended. But trust me, after the event is over and you're going through the pictures and videos of the event few days later, you'll not be proud of your countenance in those pictures, you'll know without anyone telling you that you acted stupidly. And guess what? That moment is gone, never to reoccur.
Enjoy life. It is too short for you to live everyday unhappy and bitter. Enjoy and treasure every precious moment, even your first kiss with your spouse on your wedding day whether their mouth smells good or not, because the photographer will definitely capture it, and you want to smile when you see the picture later.
4. A CHEERFUL HEART IS A SIGN OF EMOTIONAL MATURITY
It is childish and immature to get angry easily.
Ecclesiastes 7:9 says only fools get angry quickly and hold a grudge. Proverbs 14:29 also says he who is slow to anger has great understanding [and profits from his self-control], But he who is quick-tempered exposes and exalts his foolishness [for all to see].
Look at what the Bible says about God's anger: The LORD is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. (Psalm 145:8)
If you're rich in love like God, you'll be slow to anger like God.
An emotionally mature and balanced person does not keep grudges. If you keep grudges or malice, it is a sign that you're not yet emotionally mature, and also a sign that you're not giving maximum expression to the love of God the Holy Spirit has shed abroad in your heart. Do you remember this: Love is not easily angered? (1 Corinthians 13:5)
Give full expression to the love of God in your heart by being patient, tolerant and compassionate. If you do, you'll not take offenses.
5. A CHEERFUL HEART IS A SIGN YOU'RE OWNING YOUR HAPPINESS
Do you realize that you put the key to your happiness in the hands of another when you always take offence? And by so doing, give them the right to decide when you will be happy and when you'll be sad.
If you're in a romantic relationship and you hand over the key to your happiness to your partner, you may never be happy or your happiness will always be short-lived. Own your happiness by deciding not to take offence over everything and anything.
6. A CHEERFUL HEART TRIVIALIZES SOME THINGS TO REMAIN CHEERFUL
See every offence as not worth your time and precious happiness.
Trivialize whatever has been said intentionally or unintentionally to hurt you. It is not that deep, someone says. You are the one that will either make it a serious matter or a light one. Laugh off nasty comments and actions of people to protect your joy and peace of mind.
Quickly dismiss and don't accept any ridicule, mockery or contemptuous remark deliberately made to provoke you to anger. Downplay some and make light of certain issues. Protect your happiness and joy at all cost.
7. A CHEERFUL HEART IS IMPORTANT FOR PURPOSE FULFILMENT
A heart filled with bitterness, revenge, anger, malice and grudge cannot receive instructions from God pertaining to the fulfilment of their purpose, neither can they be guided by God because their spiritual ears are blocked by unforgiveness.
To fulfill your life's purpose, you need a cheerful heart that avoid distractions of any sort, such as taking offence, so your heart can remain free to receive from God and be guided by Him.
Last tip,
Always remind yourself of this scripture: But if I do not forgive others, then my Heavenly Father will not forgive the wrongs I have done. (Matthew 6:15). And if your wrongs aren't forgiven by God, you can't get anything from God. Remember this.
Ultimately, daily ask the Holy Spirit to help you to always forgive quickly and not pick offence with everything people say or do to you.
And when you inadvertently get offended, immediately remind yourself why you should not let anger stay in your heart. You don't want to look very old at 30. Bitterness dries up the bones. You want to stay fresh, lively, robust and young. Rent no room in your heart to anger and bitterness.
Laugh over that hostile statement and drop it there. It is not that deep. My husband said in his recent Facebook ministration on FORGIVENESS that people hurt you because of ignorance. If they know better, they'll not hurt you. Remember this and laugh over that thing purposed to make you angry or sad.
Tell yourself: I REFUSE TO TAKE OFFENSE no matter what. And every time someone tries to offend you, say to yourself: NO OFFENSE. I'LL TAKE NO OFFENCE.
The Lord is your strength. You can do this.
I am doing it with the help of the Holy Spirit, He's with you to help you too (if you're born again). If not, I implore you to accept the free gift of eternal life Jesus offers and be born again to receive the Holy Spirit, who'll enable you live the great life God purposed for you to live on earth through Jesus Christ.
Shalom.
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