A young rich woman by name, Mirabel, twenty-nine years of age, out of desperation to marry before she clocks thirty, got hitched to the wrong partner who sent her to the world beyond earlier than she anticipated. She met Stephen at a business seminar she attended with her PA. Stephen approached her and extended a hand of friendship, she accepted, seeing nothing wrong with it. She later discovered that they both worship in the same church.

They exchanged contacts within minutes as Mirabel got attracted to his personality, his handsomeness and his smart appearance. From friendship, they quickly progressed to relationship. From relationship, they started cohabiting (living together in Stephen's house). Mirabel chose living together with Stephen as a better way to know Stephen than having proper Christian Courtship.

Meanwhile, Stephen had dangerous intentions for wanting to marry Mirabel. But throughout the period they lived together, Stephen perfectly hid his intentions and pretended so well to love and cherish Mirabel. 

Without having Christian Courtship and Pre-marital Counselling organized by their church (since Mirabel suggested they opt for cohabitation as a better way to know each other before marriage), they proceeded to marry and had their wedding outside church. They were not workers in their church; they just attended services once in a while on Sundays; their church also was a mega church.

Mirabel was doing extremely well financially and in her career as a Real Estate and Business Investment Expert. She was a wealthy woman. Stephen on the other hand wasn't earning as much as Mirabel earned. After their marriage, Stephen put off all pretense and unveiled his true character and behavior.

Mirabel had seen, heard and read a lot on social media about toxic and abusive marriages. So she had a backup plan to escape incase she ends up in a bad marriage. Divorce was her backup plan (this was revealed by a close friend of hers after her death).

Stephen had a plan to use Mirabel to grow his wealth by getting access to all her investments and properties she had acquired and all the money she had; he wanted to attain financial independence through her, thereafter, kill her and move on with his life to marry the woman he actually loved. Mirabel loved Stephen, but Mirabel was oblivious of his evil plans.

Stephen was an aggressive man, who used violence to get whatever he wanted and had no control of himself when angered. He saw nothing wrong in beating, slapping or hitting a woman; he believed it's an effective way to correct a woman and make her submit to her husband. Mirabel also didn't know this about Stephen before they got married. Stephen had at one time beaten and hospitalized a friend of his. But throughout the time they cohabited, Stephen carefully prevented this aspect of his character from manifesting.

One day, after marriage, Mirabel did something that got Stephen very annoyed that he slapped her. Mirabel stood, shocked and motionless. But guess what, Stephen reached out immediately and apologized to her, promising never to slap her again. So, Mirabel forgave him. She said to herself, "He was just angry. He will never do it again. Besides, I was the one who annoyed him, it's my fault, I shouldn't have annoyed him. I should never annoy him again."

Another time, they had a major disagreement and Mirabel insulted him, this time around, he didn't just slap her, he struck her repeatedly with his fists and beat her severely with his belt. Mirabel cried bitterly and said she was leaving the marriage. It was time to use her backup plan. It was time to get a divorce. She told Stephen she was leaving the marriage. Immediately she said that, Stephen went down on his two knees and began apologizing to her, promising that he would never beat her again, that he loves her. He just didn't know what came over him. Mirabel said nothing and angrily entered the bedroom and locked the door. 

Mirabel phoned her close friend and narrated her ordeal to her. Her friend encouraged her to get a divorce immediately. Stephen slept in the sitting room that night and tomorrow morning, he dashed out and came back with a brand new car to apologize to Mirabel. Mirabel considered the fact that the gift was pricey and thought: "He couldn't have bought such pricey gift for me if he didn't love me." She also considered the love she had for him, so, she decided to forgive Stephen once more and gave him another chance.

Stephen realized that Mirabel was becoming impatient and could divorce him if he abused her again. So he decided to hurry up with his plans and kill her fast. Stephen finally got access to all that Mirabel owned, and it was time to kill Mirabel and end the marriage and move on to marry the woman he loved and was secretly cheating on Mirabel with.

While Mirabel was having a nap on the day of her death, Stephen went into the room and snuffed life out of her by using a pillow to suffocate her. After killing her, he called her family to report that Mirabel was having a nap and suddenly woke up, screaming her chest, before he could rush her to the hospital, she had given up the ghost. This was how Mirabel was killed in her marriage. It was years after that the truth was discovered when Stephen confessed all he did to Mirabel's parents after someone preached the message of Jesus Christ to him and he was convicted of his sins and gave his life genuinely to Christ.

Jesus forgave Stephen his sins, but few weeks after, he was diagnosed with a terminal STD while serving his punishment in prison, the STD eventually claimed his life. Sadly, Stephen got forgiveness from God before he died and I believe made heaven. But Mirabel died without getting forgiveness; she died as a sinner as she never believed in being saved from sin. She just went to church occasionally without considering the need to have a personal relationship with God and live righteously. She winded up in hell while the man who sent her to hell early ended up going to heaven. This story was shared to provide guidance and direction for those who're not yet married and to instruct parents.

What do we learn from this story? Well, today, many single men and women, ladies especially, see divorce or separation as an escape route from a troubled marriage. They have separation or divorce as a backup plan should they marry an abusive husband or a troublesome wife. So, they don't care to give choosing a life partner the much needed carefulness it requires. They forget that having separation or divorce as an emergency door of exit doesn't guarantee that you'll get the chance to use it before death comes. Every airplane has an emergency door of exit, but it is not every time that the passengers get a chance to use it to escape death or physical harm. Sometimes the plane crash can be instantaneous that no passenger gets to use the emergency door to exit to safety. Death sometimes come unannounced and without a warning.

Some singles do not even believe in praying to marry God's will, while others don't consider God's leading in choosing a life partner important. They simply rely on their own wisdom and smartness, or their instincts and intelligence to choose a life partner, not realizing that no man knows the heart of any person than God. They also fail to remember that there are wicked individuals out there with a sly personality, who are perfect at pretending and deceiving people. These singles work with worldly and earthly wisdom, hoping to use such wisdom to outfox the devil, not knowing that you can only outfox the devil with godly/divine wisdom (wisdom from God).

Mirabel was 'smart' to have divorce as a backup plan, but she was not smarter than the devil who masterminded and executed her death before she could use her backup plan of divorce to escape the death planned for her by the man she married.

Another lady had separation as her escape route from an abusive or troubled marriage. But the first beating her husband gave her and angrily hit her on the forehead with a hot pressing iron killed her instantly. She had no opportunity to use the escape route she relied on to flee from death. Some other women and men have also gone to their early graves because their spouse sacrificed them for money rituals and they never got the chance to flee from death through the escape route they had relied on.

On social media today, a lot of people advocate and champion getting a divorce or separation in an abusive marriage, without hammering on the most important factor to avoid an abusive marriage, which is: choosing the right person to marry in the first place. And so, many teenagers and unmarried adults don't see the need to carefully and prayerfully choose a life partner because they have their hopes on either separating or getting a divorce should they marry the wrong person. Prevention is still way better than cure. 

The devil cannot be outwitted with worldly wisdom. Like Mirabel and some other women and men, the devil took their lives before they could escape death through the escape route they came into marriage with. Some others escaped death, but not without a shattered career, shattered life, indelible wounds and marks on their body, disfigured body parts, ailing health, agonizing memories, low self-esteem, deep sense of insecurity, insanity, or irreparable damages done to their whole life. 

You should want to escape divorce by all means possible and not have it as a backup plan, because divorce is not as relieving and as easy as people paint it (especially when you have children or you love your spouse genuinely). Imagine what God Himself hates, would it really be soothing and sweet? Think about it. A wise man said: Death is better than divorce, because when a person dies, you don't see them on earth anymore and will eventually move on, but when you divorce your spouse, you'll still see them on earth and see them around, this prevents you from moving on easily, as each episode resurrects the pains and awakens the hurts you experienced and the cycle continues for a long time.

So, you should avoid divorce by being extra careful on who you make your life partner. Don't try to outsmart Satan except you're using godly wisdom. Earthly wisdom will fail you so badly because it can't stand the wittiness and cleverness of Satan. If you're courting someone and they're slapping or beating you, you should never consider going into marriage with them for any reason. Once you're in, getting out may not be as easy as you imagined and as quick as you planned. Because when you genuinely love someone, you can do unreasonable things; you can be slow, weak or unable to take necessary and urgent actions to preserve your life even when it is seriously under attack. 

If you're a child of God, PRAYERFULLY choose who to marry, so you don't fall into the trap of the devil organized to shorten your life and truncate the fulfilment of your destiny. Don't choose without God's leading. There are a lot of perfect pretenders, deceivers and hunters out there. Please be led by God. Pray and be patient for God to reveal the character and real intentions of the person proposing marriage to you or the person you're planning to propose marriage to. Don't rush for any reason. 

You should even know as a lady that something is fundamentally wrong when a man is hurrying to make you his wife without patience to follow due process, like Courtship and Pre-marital Counselling. Ensure God is the One leading you to marry anyone. You only get it right with God's leading. If you're considering marrying someone and after praying and seeking the mind of God, God says 'No', please don't go ahead. Listen to God. He knows the heart of all men. No matter what you see, hear or read, never agree to marry someone God has not permitted you to marry - the enticement notwithstanding - never give in. Pretenders, deceivers, and hunters can't slip pass God if you make God your Analyst and Screener. 

Do not choose a life partner casually, especially if you're a born again child of God. The devil will want to bring one of his sons or daughters to you, so he can use them to accomplish His mission of killing, stealing and destruction in your life. You need a life partner who'll elongate your life on earth and not cut short your life on earth. You need a life partner who'll help you realize your destiny and fulfill your days on earth. Partner with God closely to get such a life partner. Don't just trust your instincts or intelligence.

Avoid choosing by sight. A man or woman may seem gentle and harmless today but will change to become a "beast" or a "terror" tomorrow to torment and terrorize your life. You can't see what will happen few years from now. This is why God who sees the future and knows the present and the future state of anyone remains your best Advisor and Guide when choosing a life partner. He knows what any man or woman will change to become tomorrow. Let no man or friend deceive you: you need the wisdom and guidance of God to choose the right partner. Seek God's face earnestly in prayers before making anyone your life partner. This might look old-fashioned, but it remains the only path you must take to avoid marrying the wrong person.

Having an escape route or a backup plan is not the wise way to escape an abusive marriage and outsmart the devil. Choosing the right partner from the outset is the wise way to outsmart Satan and escape entering a terrible marriage. The person you marry can either elongate your life or shorten your life on earth. They can either help you fulfil your destiny or hinder you from fulfilling your destiny. Work with the wisdom of God and be safe. 

Mothers and Fathers, please, don't just teach your children to have divorce or separation as a backup plan, when you do this, you're unknowingly telling them not to take the issue of choosing a life partner serious, but to casually choose anyone, if it doesn't work out, they separate or divorce. Remember what happened to Mirabel and the other woman that died instantly on the first physical abuse she received from her husband. Divorce or separation is not the perfect backup plan as one may never get the chance to use it before death snatches them away or serious harm comes upon them. 

You should rather train your children (male and female) in the way of the Lord and help them build godly character as you rightly live out the roles of a husband and a wife in the home for them to see. You should also teach them how to be a good wife and how to be a good husband. And most importantly, teach them how to choose the right man or woman to marry as you constantly pray for them to choose right. You will not mourn over your children in Jesus' Name. 

It is very possible to choose the right person the very first time you're choosing a life partner. That is God's will for all His children, and it is not by chance nor by luck. You deliberately humble yourself and ask God for help and then choose the right person with God's guidance. God established the institution of marriage. No matter how we try to remove God from the equation and still hope to get a good balance, we will never have such. If you don't let God in during your decision process and in your marriage, you'll never truly taste the sweetness God poured into marriage. He established it and He knows the right person you can enjoy the sweetness with. Don't neglect God or push Him aside. Don't ignore Him when choosing a life partner.

Finally, if you're not saved (born again), praying to God to give you the right partner isn't the right prayer you should be praying now, because heaven will not respond. You must first confess Jesus as your Lord, repent and leave your life of sin and decide to serve God genuinely in righteousness and holiness. It is when you first have a good relationship with God as your Father, that you qualify to ask God for anything in line with His will, plan and promises for His children, and He'll give it to you. Make the decision right now to serve God sincerely and establish a personal relationship with Him. Live holy henceforth and in obedience to God's commandments in the Bible. Then ask God to guide you to the right partner and He'll grant your request.

I hope this blessed you. Feel free to drop your comments and questions below if you have any and we (I and the Holy Spirit) will gladly respond. 

Stay blessed.


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